Elegant Vampire Look for Halloween or Photoshoots

Step 1, Porcelain skin:  I start out with a primer, today I am using Hard Candy's primer. It's really silky smooth and covers over everything without needing too much.  After, I use Almay's Clear Complexion for the first layer of foundation.  I prefer this brand because it has Sasylic Acid to help fight back acne.  Next, to really get that perfect, flawless skin, I add another layer of foundation.  This is L'Oreal's matte mousse.  I use it mainly on the areas where blemishes or flaws are easier to see, so mostly the nose and cheeks, blending into the neck and chin a little.  Because I am naturally pale, I already use the lightest shades both companies make.  Next we're going to set the look.  NYC Loose Powder in translucent is the best, but it does tend to get a little messy.  Just blend all over! You can never look too pale!

Step 2, The Eyes:  To save on time (which didn't help at all and I ended up having to speed the whole video up), I did the first eye already.  With an eye shadow applicator apply a nice matte cream color all over the lower lid, adding an extra layer on the inside corner and center.  Next, take a light mocha color with a round brush and follow the curve of your eyelid to really get that sunken in look.  I like to wing mine out for a more seductive look.  Next take a darker brown and just gently place in the out corner to really define the curve.  Bring that shadow applicator back and use a white to highlight the brow area, this will really help set the sunken and sullen look we just created with the brown.

Next the eyeliner! I use an waterproof eyeliner by Wet'n'Wild, but I do not suggest it if you are inexperienced with liquid liners. Use a felt tip liner if you are still a beginner.  I like to start a thin line on the inside corner and slowly make it slightly wider as I come into the middle.  I start the wing next and meet back in the center with the first line we started, filling in the gaps and spaces we left.  Make sure they look even!  If you have a really hard time with matching, go ahead and use the old trick of tape to create a perfect wing.

For the bottom, I got my red pencil from Hottopic but they discontinued the Morbid line and now use Blackheart.  Any red pencil will work so long as it is soft and truly red.  Next use that round smaller brush and take an orange-y red shadow to fan out, soften, and set the red eyeliner.  Really go up into that outside corner to keep the look of blood induced tear ducts.  Next use a white pencil for your water line, my pencil is a Korean brand I can't read. ;[ oops.  The white I am BLENDING with any red that got in there to create an orange/pink look, really getting that blood look but still opening up your eyes more.  Take the same black liner and LIGHTLY follower your lash line.  It looks solid now, but once we add the mascara, it'll break up the liner.

Mascara! My only non-cheap make up piece here is my Benefit Big Gal Lash mascara, but you can get the little travel size for ten bucks.  I brush this along the bottom lashes to break up the liner and define the eyelashes.  A cheat for Benefit, is Maybelline's Full'n'Soft mascara, which I used on the top after curling the lashes.

Now for my photo shoot I actually used false lashes, but I didn't have any for this tutorial and it still turned out pretty seductive.  So do whatever you are comfortable with.  But I wouldn't suggest 'overly extravagant' lashes. You still want that elegant, modern vamp look.

For the dots, I just used the tip of the eyeliner.  You can do the dots or not.  It's sort of a signature feature for me.

Step 3, Contorting: I still want the vamp dead look, so I am using a darker matte brown for my cheeks with an angled brush.  Apply UNDER the cheek bones, suck em in if you can't find those bones.  And then blending up into the hairline. It might seem dark now, but in photographs it comes out really nice.  You can blend for wearing either with your hands or a kabuki brush.  Make sure your cheeks look even.  With a lighter brown, just follow the sides of your nose, to really define it out of all that porcelain skin.  Then highlight the bridge with a streak of white down the middle.

Step 4, The Lips: If you have custom fangs like I do, or even premades, put them in first! It really does make a big difference when applying your lipstick.  So I am using Jordana brand for the lips.  I have a lip liner in burgundy that I am lining and slightly filling my lips with, top and bottom.  Next use a bright red and fill in the centers of your lips first, working your way out.  Once that is done, you can start blending the bright red with the dark wine color until it is an even, smooth looking transition.

Now you are done!  Style hair accordingly to your fancies and prepare to amaze people with this flawless look. :-*  Good luck, fellow vamps!

Stylist Pet Peeve

Welcome to my first edition of Stylist Pet Peeve! Where I share with you some of utmost pet peeves with clients as a hairstylist. Maybe you can learn from this post and treat your hairstylist better, or maybe you are a hairstylist and you'll nod your head in agreement. Either way, let's get this started!

I have not been in the hair field for very long, yet, but I have been in retail for a good six years and deal with the same attitude no matter if I'm selling clothes or doing your hair. Prices. Price complaining to be exact. I cannot even begin to count how many times I've heard, "But I can go somewhere else and get it so much cheaper!"

That's right.

I can't stand when a customer comes in to the salon and asks about a haircut. I tell them the starting price and they frown, but get the hair cut anyways. Then when they come to check out, it's almost like they forgot to be disappointed. So when I tell them the total, they complain and mutter how they've never paid that much for a haircut before. How ridiculous. Over priced!

Or the other scenario!
"I could go to Supercuts and get it cheaper."

BY ALL MEANS! PLEASE. Go to Supercuts and get a cheaper cut. But don't come crying to us when you get what you paid for. True, there are some very talented stylists in Supercuts. I know a few and love them. But let's face facts, massive companies that train their employees to do all the same cuts and same styles as each other do not exactly have a good track history of satisfied customers. So that's why you come to a salon. You come to a salon to feel reassured that your stylist will take the time on your hair like it was their own. You come to a salon to feel pampered and special. Not just another head when it's your turn in line for a generic hair cut. At salon you get a nice personal level of communication. And it's often less crowded. But nothing makes me want to satisfy you when you complain you could get it cheaper at Supercuts! When you come to me, asking for your own unique hairstyle, I'm going to do my best AND BETTER to give it to you. Because in the salons that 'charge too much' every haircut, color, or style we give you is a work of art. And not a single one after is like it. Each one is unique with our signature touch.

By all means, go to Supercuts and get a cheap hair cut. And for your sake, I hope you have one of those stylists there that actually care how you look when you leave. But don't come back crying to me if you don't. Or better yet, DO! And then think about how you just paid for two haircuts rather pay one price for the look you want.

You get what you pay for sometimes. So be wary.

Solution; why not ask the stylist to see a few photographs of their hair cutting style before you complain a 30 dollar haircut is too much? You might understand why we charge a tiny bit more.

Hello Again!

Promised I'd try and update more, right! The keyboard setting on this app isn't very sensitive though, so forgive me if I make any typing errors. It's mainly the space bar. Remember when your old REAL life keyboard would start to die, or you dropped chips in it like I often use to, and you would feel it necessary to just beat the shit out of whatever key so much as dared not work?! Haha that's I feel about the space bar on the app! But it seems to be doing well in landscape mode.

Well, here I am at my local job. It's busy with holiday shoppers all around me, but no one pays any mind to me. Instead I get to people watch and listen to this insane stuff they call 'Christmas music'. It's a little bitter sweet you could say. Or maybe it's just the soft singing of 'have yourself a merry little Christmas' that is making me feel a little nostalgic. I see couples, families, good friends just strolling by. Getting gifts or spoiling themselves. From this distance, they all seem so happy! So care free! The only thing they know is that it's the holidays, an excuse to go shopping.

Then you have my side of it! I'm here having to entice them to buy stuff, assist them in picking it out, ringing them up, answering their questions!
No, I don't do gift wrap.
Yes, we have glitter.
No, I don't do nails like the poster we have and NO I don't know how they did it.
Do you want a bag/box/receipt with that?

Ha ha ha. Sure does make for a long, tiring day of not being mentally stimulated. I get here and I am immediately bored out of my mind. Even though I should be studying for my barbering exam coming up this Wednesday, I'm so bored that none of it makes any sense to me! I end up reading all the answers I get wrong and wonder how I got it wrong ever. I digress though. I guess when I'm at this part of work I tend to let my mind day dream. And with the holiday music playing softly over the sound system, it's not hard to day dream of romantic cuddles, a fire place and some hot chocolate while the snow falls silently just outside the window.

You can send the girl to paradise, but her mind will always wander back to the snowy mountains!

Brrrr! I got a chill just thinking about it!

Anyways! I'm getting really anxious for Christmas, for a day off with my family and food! We always have fights on the holidays, but it's family tradition. We play card games, exchange gifts, listen/watch football. My mom and I watch movies. And this year we're trying something a little different, since we live on the island away from family. Guess we're inviting friends over too. Who knows if they'll show up! But either way we'll be decked out in holiday glitz and glam! With a bottle (or three) of booze in our hands! We don't have a big tree, it's actually an embarrassing one to tell the truth, but it SMELLS like winter.

I'm just glad to be sharing it with my mom and sisters once again. The two Christmases I spent away from them was so lonely and unspecial. Christmas is definitely family time. I may not have someone special to share it with last year or this year either, but I've got my main ladies! Maybe I'm not ready to share a Christmas with an outsider anyhow! Haha. I'll just put on my favorite Christmas movie (White Christmas, Home Alone, Meet Me In St. Louis. hey dont judge! its got a Christmas scene!) and snuggle up with princess Zoola and be perfectly content.

Maybe have a mug of hot cocoa and peppermint schnapps too ; )

Either way! I'm ready for the holiday to start already! Bring on the folly!

Time To Get Back Up to Date

Woah!
Well, I totally epically failed at ever updating my blog, didn't I?  And just wait until you guys see all my youtube videos.  I epically failed at my 365, as well.  One big hot mess of epic fail! WTF FOR THE LOSE OMFGLMAOROTFCRYING.

Let's get you caught up, shall we?



I started school here in Hawaii after getting several shots.  I haven't had
a shot since I got stabbed in the chest with a pencil! Either instances sucked.
I hate needles.  Unless it's a tattooing needle. ; )  I also learned how to
take the public transit!  Shocking!



I got to four thousand tweets in Nov. 2012... There were a lot A LOT of out takes and bloopers
from this video, but I wasn't allowed to make ten minute videos back then so I had to
try and limit it down as much as possible.  But some time after this, YouTube decided
that I can bore your lives with even LONGER videos of silliness!



Then my boyfriend at the time had called it quits simply because I requested
you know, one hour of his week to spent talking to me.  And instead
of scheduled call happening, see he decided to have a midnight BBQ
with all of his friends instead.  So yeah, I went a wee bit psycho on him.
But you can't argue with people who are in denial that they were willing
to put in the effort of a relationship, but when it actually came down to
it, no... indeed they were NOT ready.  But this was last year.  It made
me stronger.  Yet again.



I started doing fun things in school for extra credit and something to do,
keep my mind off of my loneliness and broken heart.  First Fridays are
the only events we as students really get to set our talents wild!  Fantasy
hair and make up, costumes galore, music, runway, dancing, and drinking!



Christmas comes around and I am starting to make new friends and family
in school with my class mates.  We have a secret santa and potluck lunch.
And two other classmates and myself decide to feed some of the homeless
that lurk around Chinatown. ♥



And I get drunk and decide to wrap presents! Dressed as a bass loving
bee?



I put on an event for New Year's at this jazz bar called The Dragon
Upstairs.  It went down in absolute flames! But I still managed to
have a good night.  Thanks to a SHIT LOAD of booze.  And I made
the often mistake of mixing vodka and whiskey.  Yep, super drunk.
And confess my 'undying love' for my ex.  Oh booze, you silly loose
lips maker!




In light of the new beginning I vowed for myself by moving to Hawaii,
and for the new year of the Dragon, I decided to give modeling a chance
again.  Even though walking a runway makes me want to puke from nerves!
So, January comes around and I am volunteered to be Babydoll from Suckerpunch
in First Friday Movie Mash Up.  Guest videographer being my sister.



Brother came from home to visit us! And I decided to really hit the deep
end in my depression and we all make up a drinking game! In which I'm
the test rat.  Let's just say, I only really remember this night because I
filmed some of it and my brother and step dad filled in the rest.  I pretty
much blacked out before the monkey bars.  I ended up sleeping under
the car port that night. I do remember crying that my mom would be upset
if I threw up in the house! Ha, ha.  Even when I'm wasted, I'm super
considerate of my mama. ♥



Suddenly my life has meaning again when I really start to venture into the
life I've always wanted when I do my first on-set photo shoot styling with
the talented photographer Sara Anslow. (Check her out on facebook!)

I started playing hooky from school and hang out with a boy that I really
start to like.  This is the first day he convinced me to do something fun.
And in reality, I was the one who suggested it!  The Waikiki Zoo is
actually really cool.  It's surprisingly big considering we live on an island.



In May, I have really gotten into doing special events.  I even got my own
group together for a Zombie First Friday theme. ♥ I have always wanted
to do fake blood and the dead look!  For my first time, I learned a lot and
had super mucho fun.  I really had a group of friends to help me, as well.
And simply beautiful models!



Summer is getting near and the Bear and I really are starting to like each
other.  We even got to show one of his friends from back home around
the island. Kailua beach and Waimea. If you ever get to check out a tourist
spot on the island, I highly suggest Waimea Valley. ♥



My hair is so disgusting from bleaching so much the past year and then
from sea salt, oceany time, ELEMENTS! I decide to have Chloie chop
it all off in a very posh, modern design I came up with.



July 21st, my friend from beauty school, died in a tragic accident. Rest
in peace, Frannie my dear.  You were a beautiful woman, just really
misunderstood and alone in the world. ♥



Mid-August I finally graduated from beauty school in only eight months!
All of my hard work finally paid off.  I even got THE owner of the school
to do my graduation speech.  Later, my three best buds and I went to
my favorite Chinatown bar and I got swasted.  Super swasted.  Also by
now, Bear and I had become an official couple that many people were
jealous of. HA!



August 24th I celebrated my first complete year in Hawaii! Naturally
I had to go to the beach and throw my first lei back into nature.  Circle
of life style.  I love Hawaii and despite all of my ups and downs, I would
never NOT move to Hawaii if given the option.  I love it here.



In September, we get an adorable, ditzy puppy that takes us a while to
name. She's super cute and well mannered.  Just love the puppy.  I
also got a job at a salon, receptionist work until I complete training. And
Bear and I celebrate one full month of not killing each other in our relationship!
Yay!



Halloween time again! A fricking tsunami comes to town to ruin all of our
street festival fun!  So luckily, because we're all good students and cool
with the owner of the school, we all hang out there with him and my homegirl
Leesha! So, even though it didn't go as planned and practically no one
got to see my amazing (and expensive) costume, we still had a lot of fun.



And then November comes, again, and I end up alooooooone.  Just short of our four month
anniversary no less, Bear and I make an adult decision.  We were having a difficult time.
I was getting antsy and wanted to live together, he wasn't ready to commit and used any
excuse in the book.  And let's just say we were having some family problems that didn't allow
us to focus on OUR problems as a couple.  And what happens when other people try to make
your business theirs?  Suddenly you don't have a relationship between a man and woman (or manxman, womanxwoman), you have group therapy instead.  So, we decided we weren't exactly going down
the same path any more now that we weren't in school together.  We call it a 'break' sometimes,
but mostly it's a 'break up'.  I don't know, I don't understand it.  We're still hanging out and
doing 'friend dates'.  But to tell the truth, it's really weird and kinda depressing to go from
making out with a person you love, to only giving them awkward hugs.  Ha, ha.  And of course
Zoola was super sick and just decided to be sick all over my bed!



Little did I know that this was the first week of a whole month full of
only getting ONE day off a week. And not only do I only get one day off
a week, but I usually use my one day off to further my education or make
MORE money to make up for the money I don't make because I'm only
a receptionist under thirty hours a week!  It's so insane!  I work so much.
But only for like five hours or there.  They over work me, but have found
an awesome way to NOT pay me like I do. Hahaha.  And training is getting
extremely frustrating.  I thought I could handle being someone's assistant,
but I don't feel like I'm learning anything.  I feel I'm just doing someone else's
job for less pay than I am worth. HMPH.



Thanksgiving time! At least in this video I seem a little happier.  Finally
getting back to normal feeling.  Still lonely for sure, but it's something I
usually get use to after two or so months.  And I got to spend Thanksgiving
with my family and dog.  And a delicious bottle of champagne!  Thanks to Aaron
for getting me into THAT at least! JK.  Everything Aaron got me into
is awesome. Bahaha.

 

To say that my moods swing like a fucking swing would not be a lie.
Ha ha. I'm still struggling here and there, especially with the threat of
sending my doggy away!  It's like, fuck man! Get rid of my boyfriend
against my own will, get rid of my dog against my own will, get stuck
working at the fucking nail kiosk against my own, and ruined my bangs!
And the sad part is, all of this is just decisions because I am an adult and
I am facing my problems FINALLY instead of running from them or pretending
they don't exist.  I already did that for a good portion of my adult life, time
to step up and fix things how I want them!


WELL! That's it!  The last three videos are the latest ones!  All up to date and what not.  Of course I skipped a lot in between because this post I only wanted to give you the highlights (and low lights, haha) of what's been going on as viewed in my 365 project.  : ) But now that blogger has an app, I will HOPEFULLY do more blog posts.  I really want to get into it and share things that I do.  Like art projects, hair projects, events, ideas, thoughts on life!  Who cares!  I like the gift of sharing, haha! ♥  Well, I think that is all I have for now!  I've got a lot more things to do on this big wide world of web!  I'm actually thinking about opening an etsy.com shop!  Just for a little pocket change here and there to support my shopping addiction.( o____o Nothing will support that though except maybe Bill Gates ;] )

Until next time lovers!
xoxo
alexisxstetic

Some Of My Work Lately

All make up by me

Modern pinup style; make up by me

Modern pinup theme: make up by me

All make up by me, except for the beauty in the chair.

Theme: India

Golden girl hair by me

Golden girl hair by me

Close up of the hair

Side view

Sweet heart up do and make up by me

Hair and make up

Make up by me

Soft, natural look

Both natural looks by me

Soft eyes and pouty lips by me

Mohawk style by me

Butterfly inspired eyes

Candy cane inspired eyes

In Which Silliness Ensues

Aloha!
It's been a long while since I've last updated.
For shame, for shame. I'm sorry...  So here
is the last few weeks in my video documentary
life!  What an exciting time... For the most part.




Hang out day with Jim! First roamed around in traffic for hella days.
Then we went to Diamond Head... or something... That is a giant inactive
volcano. Then we left, hahaha.




Another day of hair modeling... actually, all over modeling. Hair,
make up, and clothes. And attitude. One of the girls at my sister's
school was putting on a 'Punk Princess' themed birthday party and
wanted to encorperate a fashion show into it. Too bad my sister
did not inform of this BEFORE I AGREED to "help come up with a punk
princess theme hair and model it for her".




Dave & Buster's




Paper mache day




Commentary slide show




Kaydance to sushi

Island Fever, Where You At? Week 4+5

It is now week four and five! Wow, it's hard to believe I've
been here practically a whole month now... And what
have I got done? Jello shots, new bank, checked out
a few schools, model half nakkie for First Friday,
went out with some military wives, killed zombies
all day with my baby sister... I really need to get
on the ball though... It's so hard! I just love it
here so much, I feel relaxed. Like vacation from
reality.

Let's check out week 4 and 5, shall we?





So the other night my mom texted me (from down the hall, I
know, right?) saying she wanted ten jello shots. Curious,
I replied back asking if she could even handle any jello
shots! Those things are kind of hard to swallow... For me
anyhow. Then she admitting to never having had one, so naturally
we had to make some.

Went to the PX and naturally, had to go down the Halloween aisle!
Pffft, lexi wigs. It made me chuckle because that's one of my
nicknames. So I had to be a bit silly. And then I saw this AMAZING
candelabra that was all gothic-y and SPARKLY. omgwtf. It was pretty
rad. And cheaply made. Probably would have fallen apart if I so much
as looked at it wrong. Either way, it caught my fancy. I wanted it
for my non-existent desk! Ooohh yeaaah baby. Haha. Anyways.
We got some apple flavored vodka, UV! haha, nasty. And some skull
rubber ice tray. This proofed to be successful to a certain degree;
as in, it fit in the fridge and is easy to clean. But if you
want your jello shot to look...um... pretty... I do not really
suggest rubber to hold it. And yes, I am a messy pourer! Cooking
is not my first calling, that's for sure. Even when it's just jello.





My family wanted to help me get prepared for Halloween this year,
so they took me to the beach even though all of them were tired
from work or school or just tooth pains.  But that was about as far
as the help went.  First things first, though.  My jello shots!

I worked really hard making these jello shots for my mom and her
tooth ache. (Not really, the fridge did the most work. I just mixed
the stuff together and poured.)  And come to find, she tells me she
looked at them and then wished she had regular jello instead! Rude!
So we never did end up eating them that night, but that next morning
well... afternoon, we had a little.  Well.  She had a little.  I had one
skull and um... half of that bowl.  All before the beach, too.  Let's just
say... THEY WERE AMAZING.  Maybe I'm a little slow on the
college kid partying technique, but hey, I have a very good reason.
My best friend made some once and they were very intimidating and
quite honestly, looked disgusting!  Not the case with mine!  Mine looked
beautiful, to say the least.  Strawberry jello with apple UV.  Haha, oh
UV vodka... So cheap... so nasty...  My mommy doesn't like to be
in videos, however.  So... You got to stare at the pretty jello for about
a whole minute.  Haha.

I don't remember the name of this beach... Actually, I never was told it
nor seen a sign for it.  I just know it's 'down the street' from Schofield.
There's two turns, left one to the beach, and the right one to Hale'iwa
(where the Killer Tacos resides!).  So, yeah... Speaking of which. I
really wanted Killer Tacos... but like I suspected my family just stared
at me like I was retarded.  I TOLD YOU I WAS THE ONLY ONE
WHO LIKED IT.  Sigh.  Anyhow, we went to the beach and the waves
were ruling today. Like pretty crazy for it only being afternoon... They're
a lot fuller looking in person. So was that airplane that was quite seriously
over our heads. Right before the beach we stopped at is a place popular
for wind surfing.

We made camp on a little sand dune. Haha, and my step-dad got soaked super
bad because we told him that the waves would come up that close. Did he
listen? Nope, nope. It was pretty funny to see him jump up like he was on
fire or something. They all went in the water, but I was just wearing my
string bikini bottoms... The waves... yeah, they would have stole those
off of me instantly. : P And we didn't want that now did we? They sure
did not swim for very long however. My mom freaked the eff out and swore
she saw a sting ray swimming around in the waves. Kaydance thought it was
a flower (I could see it from where I was, it would have been a big ass
flower) and dad said possibly some sort of fish. But honestly now, what
sort of sea creature let's the waves toss it around like that? I still
think it was just a big piece of bark or whatever. Could have been a
dead sting ray, I guess. But I always heard they lived in shallow,
calm areas. With lots of rocks to hide under. Sting rays are anti-social
I'm pretty sure... Or was it social... I think bat rays are social...
Hence why you can pet them at Seaworld... Wait... I'm getting all
sorts of confused on my sea life now. -__-'

So when they finally came back because mom had ruined their swim
time, I thought it'd be a good time to recruit my sister to help me
find some shells! No, instead she ran up and down the beach, without
me, and tripped and ate sand. Then came back over and fell asleep.
Needless to say, I went and wandered on my own. Found a lot of little
shells, mostly unacceptable ones to me. (meaning they weren't 'pretty'
enough to grace my body for Halloween). It was actually nice to just
walk along the edge of sand and wave, inspecting the ground casually.
And I did have good luck finding one really unique-ish one. That I
joked around about putting on my belly button. Hahaha.

Then we went to Wahiawa and picked up my sister, had dinner, and yep.
Family time. Been there, done that! Bam.




Headhunterz! Aaaahh, so amazing! What an amazing day,
not to mention. Met up with my new fwiend, Jim! And
we went to my favorite beach so far, but a bit father than
the fam has taken me. There's some awesome cove action
going on in that spot. With crevices to hide in, and crabs
crawling everywhere, scuttling to hide from the human eye.
Also signs of beach bonfire. It was really cool to say the
absolute LEAST of it. I don't think I could even begin to
fully describe it's full awesomeness for you all to picture.
You will just have to come and see it for yourself. The sunset
is always pretty nice... Though it doesn't get very 'pink' ish
I've noticed. Maybe because the sun just disappears on the ocean,
where as in Tahoe it hid behind some mountains and cast beautiful
shadows and lights all over the place. Still gorgeous here,
though. And like I said before, rainbows galore! If you are
obsessed with rainbows, like DOUBLE RAINBOW GUY obsessed,
you'll absolutely love visiting or moving here. Rainbow
here, rainbow there, rainbow everywhere, every day.

So getting to know my new friend is pretty rad. It's always
exciting to hear where people are from, how they grew up,
what sort of music they like. I guess you could say I'm like
one of those 'friend collecters' on Facebook. You know, those
people who add you just because you liked the same page as them
or have one friend in common (who you don't even know that way
to begin with). The only difference is, I actually get to know
these people and am doing it in real life! Face to face, for real.
Anyways. So Jim likes a lot of good music, well, in my opinion.
:] So I stoked to hear he liked not only hardstyle, but also
Headhunterz! And it just so happened that Heady was playing
that night. Who would miss a chance to go see that?! We didn't!

We almost did though. Because we took Jim's friend Hess along
and he wanted to go to Senor Frog's. That strange, crazy bar
restaurant military hangout in Waikiki that the ladies had taken
me to last week. And you can't just leave a bro to fend for himself,
I guess. So we walked the like mile from the parking to the bar
only to find out the bouncer was someone new and wouldn't let Hess
in. Grudgingly, he came along with Jim and I on our little adventure.
And what an adventure it ended up being. For some reason, I was given
the task of directions to this club in Honolulu. YEAH RIGHT SMART MOVE.
I'm called a cupcake head for a reason! And it's not my hair lately.
So, we got incredibly lost. However in my defense, my little dot on
Google Maps was not working right. Sometimes we would be at a complete
stand still and the dot would wig out and move EVERYWHERE on the screen.
See? Not completely my fault. Though this hiccup in directions kind
of helped put the three of us in a better mood after the whole Senor
Frog's let down. And by time we got to the Soho Mixed Media Bar in
downtown (RIGHT DOWN THE STREET FROM MY FUTURE SCHOOL, so stupid me)
we were all super stoked and talkative. Hahaha, such a girl thing
for me to think. Not to mention, we missed pretty much all the other
sets. So it was pure Headhunterz that night. Freaking sweaty, humid
and sticky club for real. Only the best. Danced until my body hurt!
And man did it hurt the next day. So bummed my iphone is shotty when
 it comes to amazing bass. It shut down the sound for half a
clip just because it is not of the hard with style type of phone.

 Epic fail, iPhone, epic fail.




Saturday... I spent a bit of time with mom, especially while she was
cooking. She mentioned something that kind of broke my heart. :/
Just a tiny bit. She said, "Before you came here, the rest of the
family kind of ignored me, but I still had to cook for everyone and
what not." I don't think she meant any sort of way. She was just
talking about how she cooked before I got here and then this whole month
because of her tooth, she hasn't been cooking very much. I love my
mama so I sat in the kitchen and watched her cook, talking to her
about things here and there. Just small, meaningless chit-chat.
But it was our meaningless chit-chat and sometimes that's all
you need to show you care about that person. To just devote a little
bit of listening time. I know in the past I've made mistakes of
not really listening, or being distracted. I still do it, even to
my mom. I can honestly say though, I have been trying to break
this habit. My mom is the first step. Anyways, she made chicken
tacos. <3 I love her chicken. It's probably why chicken is my preferred meat.

What was I saying? Oh! Okay. Mark and I went to Targe't...
And it felt like home. Because everything EVERYTHING was exactly
where I had left it, in Nevada! The only difference is, that
little 'dollar items' in-let thing they have when you first walk
in? Yeah, here? It's "Hawaii Items" in-let instead. A little
touristism inside of me kind of eye balled it. But I was more just
curious what sort of tourist things they had. And if they had a big
ole bag of sea shells I could use for my costume. Nah. Just silly
things you could buy ANYWHERE, with the generic 'Hawaii!' and then
'Made in China' sticker on the bottom. Though, I did like some of
the car decals... Pretty turtles in red. <3 Red is my favorite.

The Halloween aisle is always my favorite. It's even so more
entertaining than Christmas aisle or 'as seen on TV' aisle.
I absolutely love Halloween. I love when they come out with
all of the creepy, dark stuff. Especially the gothic-esque decor.
Like that SUPERB candelabra. (I think candelabras are my new obsession).
T__T Why does it have to be fifteen dollars, though! That's just
ridiculous for ONE candelabra! Give me two and perhaps we have a
deal. Either way... I'm still thinking about how amazing it was...
and might even go back for it... Oh! And how about those adorable
peppermint Christmas lights I found? I think I want those, too.
For when I build up my vanity. It matches with my red, pink, and
black theme anyhow. Afterwords, I convinced dad to go to Petco.

Pets always cheer me up. Even in my darkest of days... a cute little
puppy face can instantly make me feel better. And lately, I have
been missing the life out of my little guy back home. :/ Life is
so weird without my mini-dachshund. All I have is Kaydance to take
for walks! And she talks! Rude! (JK, I lub yew Kay). So, pet
stores are a special treat to my heart-light. ♥ This Petco
was a bit different from mine at home. It didn't have nearly as
many pets. However, the ones they did have were simply adorable.
Even the kitties. Which is saying a lot because I rather dislike
cats. That particular one was so playful! Trying to just get me
to love him and set him free... Trust me, I wanted to. I wanted to
let them all out and roam freeeeee! Be free kitties, be free! But
that is silly. Hawaii is secretly over ran with kitties. In fact,
I'm pretty sure there is a kitty-mob here. The cats control the crazy
coke heads, making these coke heads talk to themselves. AND THEN TRY TO
TALK TO ME! Oh no, evil kitties.

... I am thinking I should stop blogging late at night. What do you think?




So we went to Waimae Valley/falls only to find it was pretty much
closing for the evening. It was still really beautiful in there.
And conveniently, there is no cell phone service! Enjoy the falls
in peace without the stress of the outside world following you. I
can think of one person in particular I might drag there JUST because
of the lack of cell phone service. ;) Evil much? Yes, yes I am. Anyways,
due to the lack of cellphone service, I momentarily got separated and
lost from my family in the gift shop. One second I was looking at
touristy things and talking to my mom and sister, the next they all
disappeared! And it wasn't a very big store, either! So, I roamed
around outside, looking all over for them! Turned out they ditched
me and went to the bathroom. -__-

Then we went to one of my step-dad's favorite beaches (at least I
assume it is because he's taken us there a few times now) Sunset
Beach over on the North-ish side. I don't really know. That whole
N,E,S,W always confuses me. I just have an eternal compass that
tells me which way the desired place is. Kind of like Captain Jack's
compass. Except... you know, inside. Somehow Kaydance came up with
the math problem that if I was minus 25 years, I'd be her baby in
forty years. It made sense to her... I guess.




30 Seconds to Mars came to Hawaii! And an amazing show it was!
Originally I was suppose to go with Venice, but strep throat
canceled all of her plans. And conveniently enough it just so
happened to be my baby sister's birthday. So the beautiful, newly
fifteen year old accompanied me to my first rock show of many to come
in Honolulu!

The venue was the water front at Aloha Towers. What an amazing view
at sunset, too! Simply breath taking. Oh, hahaha! We had such a
crazy adventure on the bus ride there! First, I got a rip in my
tights sitting on the bench. What a dumb idea that was, now that I
honestly think about it. Ugh. However, I was going to a rock show...
and what doesn't scream 90's grunge and rock than rebellious holes in
your clothes? Kaydance and I worked a little on giving the rest of my
tights some holes in order to give it a rocker vibe. And look more
intentional I suppose. He, he, he.

The first band to go on was a local band called Braxton, I think. That
or the singer's name was Braxton. It was kind of hard to understand the
announcer. Either way... We didn't quite like that first band too much.
The music would sound good, well put together and harmonized. But then
the singing would be off, almost completely a different beat. Or vice
versa. Oh well. It was still cool that 30 Seconds to Mars got some
locals to open up. The crowd was super dead, but that happens a lot
in the beginning of a concert. At least that was what I reasoned with
myself.

LET ME TAKE A TIME OUT FANGIRL MOMENT THOUGH, PLZ.

During this first band's set, I could not help but look around at the beauty
of Aloha Towers. The clock tower is superb, I love it's classic but still
and forever modern design. And the area was actually a shopping center, so
strange when you think about it. And normal venues have hot dog stands
and pretzel stalls galore. Not Aloha Tower. This one had SUSHI! Delicious
smelling sushi! The only down side? Cash. Only. Fsckers!
However awesome that is, that is not the reason I pulled you all aside for
a fangirl moment. No, the reason is; Tomo (of 30 Seconds to Mars) just so
happened to be RIGHT BEHIND ME during the opening act. I instantly knew it
was him! How could I not know it was my beloved Tomo?

Long hair? Check.
Crazy mofo beard? Check.
Amazing bass and guitar player? Check check!

It was definitely my Tomo! And the only thing standing in the way of our
destiny to be together was... a big ass concrete barrier and a nosy security
guard who kept conveniently getting in the line of my creepy stalker photo
of him! RUDE RUDE RUDE! Tomo was literately RIGHT THERE! Needless to say,
I was definitely having a field day. And no one else even noticed! No one
even noticed my Tomo just standing there, chit chatting about life with some
special VIP/Golden Ticket people. Nope. Thus making them unworthy of Tomo.
I noticed.

Okay, back to the show. Next was the two Carah and Jeremy (I think) from
Shiny Toy Guns. It was kind of strange to have only some of them... Like
what was the point? Haha. Oh well. She was pretty cute up close, but
I like my Skrillex-do on... well... Skrillex. On chicks, it just reminds
me of lesbians. Long story involving actual lesbians and this crazed
shaved side of the head thing. Like really? Why? I don't know. But I
don't judge. Anyways! Jeremy was amazing mixing. It was so smooth and
interesting to listen to. But when Carah came out and sang... Meh. Her
voice is amazing, too, just like his mixing. But without the rest of the
band, their combination together did not sit well. At least not with me.
It didn't compliment each other. Her vocals were way louder than his mixing
when really they should have been only a tiny bit higher. However, I was
totally digging the new song 'Speaking Japanese' from them. It's got that
boom boom. ; )

AND WHO COULD NOT LOVE 30 SECONDS TO MARS' SET? It was amazing. Even
if Jared ended up doing half the songs acoustically and by himself. I
guess the boys just really couldn't shake what ever bug they got on tour.
Which is why if you plan on traveling, time to boost up the vitamins and
booster shots, kids. Anyways. I think my favorite part had to be when
they did a cover of one of my favorite band's songs; U2's "Where The Streets
Have No Name". It was ... omg amazing. The crowd was still insanely dead.
Like Hawaii didn't know what movement actually was. And practically
no one knew the words. Really, guys? Embarrassing. They finished the
night with a strange encore of one of their roadie's playing with his band
a popular Foo Fighter's song. And then they finished with a song of their own.
Needless to say, good show. And as we waited for our ride to come get us
we got mauled by probably buzzing on booze AND the glory of being touched
by a Leto. Haha, I'm just so glad I had the camera on right at that second. Memories. ♥




This day we went to the Pearlridge mall. By time I took this first
footage, of the really cool furniture store, we were both exhausted
from not only mall-crawling, but from the heat. It was definitely
one of the hotter days that day. And we took the convertible.

Actually, I don't think there is much to say... Except this is
actually two days put into one. The mall and Domo-getting is one
day and then me singing Michael Jackson to Kaydance was the next.
: P sue me.




50/50

Lately I have been... Kind of in a really tough spot. A spot that
I have been in before and not known what to do, but couldn't do
anything, and wasn't very experienced in the outside/grown up world.
Now I am in this same spot and STILL do not know what to do, can't
do anything about it to help fix it, but am seeing it with new eyes.

That being said...
Doesn't make it one bit easier.

Let's just get this much out; I love my family a lot and have always
been very involved in their lives. I feel more connected to them
than average families, at least in my humble opinion. So when...
See? This sort of situation we are going through is very upsetting
and frustrating. And it's just so perfectly intense. I thought I moved
here to be emotionally supported by my family while I finished up
school and started to figure me out. Well, it feels like
the tables have definitely turned. And I feel like that helpless
little kid again who is taking on the world as her own personal
burden. I know, I know. I know it is not my responsibility or that
I should really just focus on my own thing. But family is my own
thing. If you want to marry me, you marry my whole family. You
have to get along with all them in order to get along with me. Their
pain... it's my pain.

So, today was a break down and get the worst thing I could ever get
myself day. It was a double chocolatey chip frappuccino with a pump
of peppermint for the radical price of five bucks from a Starbucks in
Mililani while my family got Kaydance a new phone for her birthday.
If you guys know anything about me, I only have a weakness for that
chocolate, non-coffee frap, and their passion tea lemonades. Those
are the only two I crave almost on a weekly schedule. And since I moved
to Hawaii, I have actually been Starbucks clean. Yup, I have been
keeping myself in strict order and not gotten a single sip of Starbucks.
Almost two whole months clean, folks. It was a tough battle...
And today I lost. And what a sweet loser-run it was.

Kaydance was finally pleased, having a new phone that didn't squeal
every time she texted and it's a lower end Android nonetheless, as
well as Venice actually getting an iPhone as a late birthday present
from the parents. All in all, it was a good day to be my little sisters.
And somewhat me, if you count the frap as good as a new phone. Though
I wish mine had been purchased as a gift for my birthday, rather than
because I was feeling particularly unhappy enough to want to indulge
in my need for not only Starbucks, but chocolate as well. So... yes?
It was a good day?

*shrug*

Next, we finally got to see the only movie I have been interested in seeing.
50/50 with the amazing Joseph Gordan Levitt and Seth Rogen. The story, in
a short non-plot-revealing summary, is about a man who finds out he has
cancer. In his spine. Painful, no? And about how it effects the people
around him, somewhat. I guess you could say it's about how it effects
the people around him from HIS POINT OF VIEW. I highly recommend it, just
bring some tissues or be a really disconnected person. Anyways. Through out the
movie I couldn't help but remember my friend Cameron Hardy, who had only just
passed away from that skanky bitch cancer back in February. It had come
as a really big, horrible shock to me. I spent the better part of the whole
day crying my eyes out. No matter what anyone said, I could not be comforted.
I was grieving. Grieving for my friend who was only 22, grieving because he
hadn't even begun his life yet, grieving because I had never made that
extra effort to see him again. Even after I had found out he had had cancer
four years prior to his passing. Our non-existent friendship was not our
own choice, as kids. But as adults, I wish I could have at least seen him
just once again. But I let myself down...

Situations with my dad, my real dad that is, have led me to life saying
"Don't regret the past, because you can't change it." And I had never
really looked back, but only because it was too painful. When Cameron
died, and that still hurts my heart to even just type, I began to live
my saying. Knowing fully well that from that day on, the only true
regret I would ever allow myself to harbor was not getting to see him
again. No matter what happened in the past, or what was going on in the
present, I would not let them become something I regretted. They would be
things I had experienced, things I could learn from and possibly use in
the future when others might be going through the same thing. I would
look back on them and instead of feeling utter despair and regret, I
would just accept them as they were. Those things that might have seemed
really bad at the time, or traumatizing, suddenly weren't. I wouldn't
allow them to be. They weren't who I was or what I was about. Some of
them may have helped shaped me into who I am now, but only for the better.

My future is my own to do what I please with, and every step I take, I
take knowing it was the one I chose and I would not look back to regret.

Live for your future, and don't regret your past~

alexis♥

ps.

Not regretting is one thing.

But apologizing to people you may have hurt is completely different.

Is there someone you should reach out to today?